A letter from Bill Gates

in Funny,Tech



Dear Momma,

I hope this mail finds you in the best of health. I am using Steve’s e-mail account to send you this mail. No not the Apple guy but my CEO Steve Ballmer. They somehow blocked my e-mail account since I exceeded the 2GB limit. So how are you Momma? I hope you’re running into fewer blue screens now. Momma remember I sent you the Windows Vista DVD last month, never mind that. You will have to buy more memory, a graphics cards, better display monitor etc. So you can still continue with Windows 98. You know those were the best ones we made! Well, I have been going through some tough times here. You must have read the papers Momma. We tried to buy Yahoo but that fucking Chinese retard doesn’t understand that his stock ain’t going up anytime soon. Google is kicking our butt with each passing day Momma. Sometimes I feel like crying on your shoulders. If Google wasn’t really harsh enough, uncle EU keeps slapping me with such record fines all the time. I’m not going to sell software over there now. But Europe is one of the few places where people still don’t know about BitTorrent so I the only few copies of software that I sell are sold there itself. Hey Momma! I’m planning to buy an iPhone for myself. It’s pretty cool you know. It does all sorts of things and it has that great touchscreen thing and I can listen to music and install apps and so much! I’m gonna ask Jobs for a rebate. It’s far too expensive you see.

Ok Momma I’m gonna have to press the Send button now! Ballmer recently updated to the Vista SP1, so the system hangs up every 5 minutes. Take care Momma, I miss you!

Love,

Your Billy!

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